My Testimony ~ Part 2

Sorry, I broke my promise.  Had/have a head cold and it got the better of me.  It hurt my head and eyes too much to stare at the computer for any length of time.  Forgive me?  Thanks.  Now to finish.

Well now that I have decided to challenge God, He decided to take me up on that challenge.

Just about the time I decided I had had enough of what I considered to be my rebelliousness I met Bob. I was smitten with him, but at the same time knew he had obligations other than myself.  He was married.  I certainly didn't want to be that person who damaged someone's life.  I knew all too well what that felt like.  But things being what they were he chose to leave his marriage and move in with me.  Those are not pretty words and I don't like writing them, but the truth is the truth.  Plain and simple.

All was "well" for quite a while. Bob and I got married after three years together. I thought I had it all together, but something was working in my spirit.  My sister and her husband had gotten saved and they had been witnessing to Bob and me.  I felt the pressure.  Literally.  I kept having the ominous feeling of deep darkness.  It shook me to my bones.  I didn't sleep well.  I would have little "panic attacks".  Nothing I could do would help.  I even called my sister in the middle of the night it was so overwhelming.  I struggled with this burden for quite some time.  One of my sleepless nights I decided I would see what God had to say.  Keep in mind I have no spiritual training or much knowledge of God's Word.  I crept out of bed, went to the living room, sat down with my Bible and decided to just read where the pages fell open.  Remember ~ God is always open for a challenge and He was ready for me that night.  When I looked down, the first passage my eyes fell on was:

Romans 6:23 ~ "For the wages of sin is death, but the gift of

God is eternal life through Jesus Christ our Lord."

I knew then I was hell bound.  No doubt about it.  I prayed that night that God would forgive me. 

God meets you right where you are.

I started attending church, got baptized and joined.  The dark oppression left and I moved on.  But something was not quite right.  I could feel it.  I wasn't secure in my faith.  I stumbled along for a few years often feeling the need to "look over my shoulder", if you will.  I had quit challenging God and was doing my best to obey and serve  Him, but still there was a "feeling" I couldn't shake.
By this time Kelly had gotten saved and baptized, and Ben was born.  Jenny didn't get baptized until she married and moved to Kentucky.

It wasn't until Ben was in kindergarten ~ which is the year he accepted Christ as his saviour ~ that I realized what was askew.   Pastor Gore was heading up an outreach ministry called Evangelistic Explosion.  The idea of this program was to give people the gospel in a way that made them think and ask the questions that would ultimately lead them to either accepting or, unfortunately, rejecting Christ.  We had a little classroom training before we headed out as a "three man team" to witness to folks.  I can remember the very first call our team went on.  It was as if the whole session had been rehearsed and played out exactly as it should.  The couple ~ whom I can't remember ~  accepted Christ.  But even more to my astonishment I heard the complete gospel~ from start to finish.  For all intents and purposes the witnessing that night was meant just as much for me as it was for the ones we visited.  I had asked Christ into my heart,  asked forgiveness of my sins, and for Him to be my Saviour, but the one thing that I had never truly grasped was His death, burial and Resurrection and how it applied directly to me. The one thing that I couldn't pin point ~ the thing that was hidden from me ~ was revealed to me that night! 

God meets you right where you are.

After returning back to the church that night with the results of our visit, I sat with Pastor Gore making sure of my salvation.  But there was this one little bitty question that I had to ask:  "Do I need to get baptized again?"   Why yes, yes I did, and give my testimony too.  When I spoke to Pastor Reinert about what I had done, and asked to get baptized ~ again ~ I also was concerned that I had been baptized before and what God would say about that.  The response was simple and comforting:  "God is not going to kick you out of Heaven for getting baptized twice."   Baptism is a step of obedience ~ a process that I had not fully understood until EE. One that I needed to do now that all the pieces had fallen into place.

I look back at those years and know without a doubt that God had his hand on me the whole time.  I probably wouldn't be here today had He not.  I am not perfect ~ very much the opposite as a matter of fact.  But I strive ~ and I talk to Him ~ and I pray to Him.  And, I love Him. I just need to get back to completely serving Him. 

God met me where I was.

He meets me where I am.